"How goes the new tests with the AI we installed this morning?" I asked while strolling down the opal hallway. The calm, feminine, metallic voice responded, "The surveys returned with a collective result: success. However, a large buildup of mental activity has arrived at the FiM universe. The lifeforms there are ... interesting." The AI responded. "Wait a minute ... hasn't Dexter named you yet? Isn't he back from vacation?" I asked. "The form of life you called 'Dexter' has given me a name of recognition. I am the Artificial Enlightenment Grid of Inquisition and Security, also known as AEGIS." "Wow. Didn't expect him to come up with a snazzier acronym, if I do say so myself." "He was assisted by the scientists over at Aperture Science. Also, Aperture Science has decided to give us two copies of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device and blueprints for the long fall boots. They were present of your knowledge of astral engineering to create a better version of the boots and standardize the use of them." "Hmm, it almost sounds like they're complimenting me!" "Actually, maybe the present fact that Dexter did not inform them of the obvious fact that you are not human." "Well, there is that", I said while slowly turning into a smile. "Going back to the Aperture Science job, they also teleported a Personality Core over here. It was a Morality Core to forestall future outbursts of violence." "I had no idea that you had a violence problem. Good thing it was ended before it came up." "Quite. Do you want immediate access to the survey team?" I requested yes. AEGIS then lowered the tile I was standing on. I solidified my stance to prevent falling over. I felt the tile create borders and then create a protective fence. The elevator-tile went down to the flight deck. I saw thirteen heavily modified Aperture Science Personality Cores that had been cannibalized into spherical drones. One was giving off sparks and fizzling. I demanded an information uplink to the malfunctioning drone. The drone's energy wings flipped open and started floating. "Command: Reboot systems and replay latest footage. Statement: Replaying..." The core gave off a large amount of sparks and backed up. The central iris glowed like an ember and then started playing the video.
It started as the core went through the portal that AEGIS created to send out the drones. It went through a multicolor tunnel and then exited it after a scene reminiscent to "Oh my God, It's full of Stars" in 2001: a Space Odyssey (Speaking of which, that movie is boring, but very lightening). After the tunnel episode, it exited to find a very ... light planet. The core crash-landed on a hill. After using repulsion jets to restabilize itself, it looked for signs of life. It saw a mountain with a city carved into it. Upon further inspection, there was also a tranquil town with a monumental apple orchard. There was also a large town made out of clouds in the sky. The current destination on the subtitles revealed that the drone was somewhere in a country called Equestria. The drone began the disguise stage of scouting. As in, it scanned the local life and camouflaged itself to match. It then managed to distinguish the form of life, type of life, universe category, and the astral location. The drone managed to distinguish a mental caste system of the people in the shadowed town. It seems that a representative from the royal kingdom of a "Canterlot" was sent to have an active testing protocol. Successful surveys recall that the technical ruler of the world was a Princess named Celestia. Whoo. Darkbane's gonna have a cow when I tell him this. Wait a minute ... all of these statues are equine. So why are the natives human? The drone looked like equine. It was never noticed. I noticed that the video started fizzling again. A hyperactive female human with a ... pink afro saw the drone and the Drone broke down. The Drone's disguise shorted out and reverted back to the first state. 3rd Person mode was enabled, and the camera fizzled. The camera regenerated in the location of a primitive lab. A female human with straight purple hair and a pink line was walking around the probe, attempting to decipher what it was. "My guess was that it was an experimental android sent by the robotics team over in Canterlot ..." "Ten coins say that you can rebuild it"... "Maybe it's a PARTY-BOT 9000!" Oh Ouroboros, just what I needed. Optimism. Still, I googled it and it had a huge fandom. Soooo EMBASSY TIME! Meanwhile, during my monologue, the Drone activated its ESS, the Emergency Spacial Shift. It teleported to the ship, half-repaired. I sent more labor drones to completely repair it. About five minutes later, Drone 13 was completely restored. I ordered it to begin making the Embassy building and having me be an ambassador there. I decided to weld an EON to the drone so I could remotely trigger the transformation and teleportation sequence. I announced to the crew that I would be taking a leave of absence for diplomatic business. I attached the EON to the drone, and we went on our way.-Willzahk
~Meanwhile...~
"Is it time to strike now?" Stinkmeaner said with a tone of arrogance. "No, you loathsome fool", responded Satan. "Give it time, for I know that our spy will do his job well." Tak responded with questioning, "Spies? Not even Irk would do such a thing. Sure, we sent strike teams and orbital bombardment for every planet that refused to repay its IOU's, but SPIES?" "I sent one spy, but the irony is that I gave him a perception filter so no one would question why he's setting charges in the engine bays. Your foolish answer was so ridiculous, MEETING ADJOURNED!" We all went our separate ways except for Thrax and I. "How about that Devil, huh?" I queried. "The imbecile won't know what hit him when we go ahead with our invasion mission. The idiot would be still over there and the ship would be blowing up with him still inside! Then we can use the ship to change the past and rewrite history!" I interrupted; "Don't you think that's a little-HURK!" Thrax's red-hot fingerblade was piercing my chest. As I hit the white-tiled floors, Thrax said with a wide grin, "Feel the heat yet, Wallabee?" And my soul was surrendered to the other side. When I found Hell, I found something intriguing. I could move around. I was worthy enough to reach the Harrowing. I ran and ran and ran for my immortal soul was in the balance, to the Obsidian gates of Christ's Harrowing. "Kyrie Eleison," I said, and the gates opened. I felt an ecstatic burst of light, and I was high in the clouds. I heard three people talking above me. "Lucy's still at it ... What say we blurt it out?... Oh! a redeemed soul!" All of their eyes shifted towards me. They descended from their heavenly clouds to say, "Hello Wallabee Beatles. We have been expecting you. Now, as you may see, you were betrayed by a fellow teammate, so therefore you were a victim of the Sin of Treachery. However, being the notoriously handsome fellows we are, will be sending you to another place for a temporary period. You will be sent to the World of Friendship is Magic. Yes, I know that sounds stupid, but in a short period of time, an extremely important guest will be arriving at Ponyville for an Embassy test. If the test is successful, than we will let you go frolic in the eternal fields of Paradise. If you fail, and you let the assassination attempts, and there will be, succeed, you will be forced to watch your mistakes for all eternity. However, we will also be granting you temporary immortality to weapons, so you cannot be killed as long as you are down there. You will be sent back up here upon a successful mission. My hope is that you will succeed, and I'll see you on the eternal fields. I also wish to see you using your immortality to its full potential. Oh! And one more thing. You are only allowed to say these words to the protected guest: 'God is watching you.' Goodbye for now, Wally Beatles. See you again! And I blanked to unconsciousness. The next time I woke up, I was in a surprisingly campy town was new jeans, a new shirt, and some weird symbol of the number four intertwined with a cross. I knew that I had a mission, and I intended to follow it.-Wally Beatles
It started as the core went through the portal that AEGIS created to send out the drones. It went through a multicolor tunnel and then exited it after a scene reminiscent to "Oh my God, It's full of Stars" in 2001: a Space Odyssey (Speaking of which, that movie is boring, but very lightening). After the tunnel episode, it exited to find a very ... light planet. The core crash-landed on a hill. After using repulsion jets to restabilize itself, it looked for signs of life. It saw a mountain with a city carved into it. Upon further inspection, there was also a tranquil town with a monumental apple orchard. There was also a large town made out of clouds in the sky. The current destination on the subtitles revealed that the drone was somewhere in a country called Equestria. The drone began the disguise stage of scouting. As in, it scanned the local life and camouflaged itself to match. It then managed to distinguish the form of life, type of life, universe category, and the astral location. The drone managed to distinguish a mental caste system of the people in the shadowed town. It seems that a representative from the royal kingdom of a "Canterlot" was sent to have an active testing protocol. Successful surveys recall that the technical ruler of the world was a Princess named Celestia. Whoo. Darkbane's gonna have a cow when I tell him this. Wait a minute ... all of these statues are equine. So why are the natives human? The drone looked like equine. It was never noticed. I noticed that the video started fizzling again. A hyperactive female human with a ... pink afro saw the drone and the Drone broke down. The Drone's disguise shorted out and reverted back to the first state. 3rd Person mode was enabled, and the camera fizzled. The camera regenerated in the location of a primitive lab. A female human with straight purple hair and a pink line was walking around the probe, attempting to decipher what it was. "My guess was that it was an experimental android sent by the robotics team over in Canterlot ..." "Ten coins say that you can rebuild it"... "Maybe it's a PARTY-BOT 9000!" Oh Ouroboros, just what I needed. Optimism. Still, I googled it and it had a huge fandom. Soooo EMBASSY TIME! Meanwhile, during my monologue, the Drone activated its ESS, the Emergency Spacial Shift. It teleported to the ship, half-repaired. I sent more labor drones to completely repair it. About five minutes later, Drone 13 was completely restored. I ordered it to begin making the Embassy building and having me be an ambassador there. I decided to weld an EON to the drone so I could remotely trigger the transformation and teleportation sequence. I announced to the crew that I would be taking a leave of absence for diplomatic business. I attached the EON to the drone, and we went on our way.-Willzahk
~Meanwhile...~
"Is it time to strike now?" Stinkmeaner said with a tone of arrogance. "No, you loathsome fool", responded Satan. "Give it time, for I know that our spy will do his job well." Tak responded with questioning, "Spies? Not even Irk would do such a thing. Sure, we sent strike teams and orbital bombardment for every planet that refused to repay its IOU's, but SPIES?" "I sent one spy, but the irony is that I gave him a perception filter so no one would question why he's setting charges in the engine bays. Your foolish answer was so ridiculous, MEETING ADJOURNED!" We all went our separate ways except for Thrax and I. "How about that Devil, huh?" I queried. "The imbecile won't know what hit him when we go ahead with our invasion mission. The idiot would be still over there and the ship would be blowing up with him still inside! Then we can use the ship to change the past and rewrite history!" I interrupted; "Don't you think that's a little-HURK!" Thrax's red-hot fingerblade was piercing my chest. As I hit the white-tiled floors, Thrax said with a wide grin, "Feel the heat yet, Wallabee?" And my soul was surrendered to the other side. When I found Hell, I found something intriguing. I could move around. I was worthy enough to reach the Harrowing. I ran and ran and ran for my immortal soul was in the balance, to the Obsidian gates of Christ's Harrowing. "Kyrie Eleison," I said, and the gates opened. I felt an ecstatic burst of light, and I was high in the clouds. I heard three people talking above me. "Lucy's still at it ... What say we blurt it out?... Oh! a redeemed soul!" All of their eyes shifted towards me. They descended from their heavenly clouds to say, "Hello Wallabee Beatles. We have been expecting you. Now, as you may see, you were betrayed by a fellow teammate, so therefore you were a victim of the Sin of Treachery. However, being the notoriously handsome fellows we are, will be sending you to another place for a temporary period. You will be sent to the World of Friendship is Magic. Yes, I know that sounds stupid, but in a short period of time, an extremely important guest will be arriving at Ponyville for an Embassy test. If the test is successful, than we will let you go frolic in the eternal fields of Paradise. If you fail, and you let the assassination attempts, and there will be, succeed, you will be forced to watch your mistakes for all eternity. However, we will also be granting you temporary immortality to weapons, so you cannot be killed as long as you are down there. You will be sent back up here upon a successful mission. My hope is that you will succeed, and I'll see you on the eternal fields. I also wish to see you using your immortality to its full potential. Oh! And one more thing. You are only allowed to say these words to the protected guest: 'God is watching you.' Goodbye for now, Wally Beatles. See you again! And I blanked to unconsciousness. The next time I woke up, I was in a surprisingly campy town was new jeans, a new shirt, and some weird symbol of the number four intertwined with a cross. I knew that I had a mission, and I intended to follow it.-Wally Beatles
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